....it's chriiiiiiiistmas...( to be said in a holder stylee)

Well we've just returned from our final weekend before christmas in Norway. (Well just over a week ago now) Our original plan was to get the house 'civilised' by christmas this year and we're not far off!

I no longer have roof envy (yes that is a proper condition....google it ;) ), the house is once again solid thanks to new timber floor beams and more importantly foundations, and we actually have bedrooms at last! When we first looked at the house we spent quite a lot of time working out how to house a bathroom and then how to get bedrooms into the existing floor plan without loosing the original. But the new layout means we can now house our family easily and the house can also be adapted for guests and when we get the en-suite in place, also means that we will have a great master suite (for us most of the time) but for guests when required. Hurrah :) 

Despite being involved in designing and commissioning building work for the last 20 years in the UK, the last year has been quite an eye opener. From the simple things like realising that dishwashers get plumbed in via the kitchen tap with a special shut off valve on the tap (trust me when/if you travel in Norway you will see this! -  it flummoxed me for years what the switch on the tap did!), that you can't just convert a room into a bathroom (you have to use membranes to protect the wall and floor structure before you tile & vinyl) ......although i recently found out that they recommend this in the UK as well, that you have a little heat sensor under your cooker hood that shuts the power off to the cooker if it gets too hot, so you don't forget about pans unattended! 

I know, I guess you had to be there ...but very important non the less! 

So Christmas is upon us we're not quite there yet and poo ing in the barn is ongoing ( I will miss it when it's gone, although I'll secretly still use it as it's the one place I take a poo in quiet! If you have kids you'll understand!)

Anyhow, thank you to all the people, old friends, new friends, new neighbours,  family (old and new), Magnus and his team of carpenters, John and his masons, Kjetil ( plumber and snow patrol rescuer) , Jan and Ove (electricians), structural engineers ( mr b) and anyone else who made the last year possible. 

Finally the pieces of the jigsaw are starting to fall into place....

God Jul. 

One final thought....what is actually in jul brus! Tastes good, but if any Norwegians actually read this then please enlighten us :) 

Turbulence

Ned and I were chatting the other day about flying. He was very excited and told me his favourite bit about flying is "where the plane goes up and our heads go back". Realisation dawning, I said "You mean take off?". "Yes mummy, and the bit where the plane goes up and down and up and down" (complete with actions!).

Well on our latest trip he certainly got his wish! As the plane started its decent into Trondheim airport, we hit turbulence and side winds; the lady next to me was looking scared; I grabbed onto the armrest; small children were crying, but from the other side of the aisle there came giggling and whoops of joy from Ned.

Trust....

I started drafting this post about a year ago but never finished it.....however because of some of the things which have occurred/ are occurring in our local community recently, I felt compelled to finish it off!

We travelled to western Norway back in 2013 for a big summer expedition with the kids for my 40th birthday and despite feeling a little under the weather I was adamant that we needed to visit a place called Hoddevik (one of Norway's well known surf spots). There was one particular image which was embedded on my mind, which was of the name sign to the village perched high up on the mountain road that eventually dropped down to see level along a switch backed single track road.

The entire journey just to get to that sign post had been pretty epic, a 2.5 hour drive from the summer ski area of Stryn along some insane roads, complete with one ferry crossing and then finally arriving at this amazing vista.

As we dropped down into the village there was even a surf shop/ B&B which i hadn't even imagined and the beach, of course (and quite rightly so) was pretty deserted. There were a couple of surfers playing in the small swell, an old beaten up camper van and a tent, few picnic tables, the skeletons of some old boats and it was heaven! It was how I'd always imagined it, desolate and isolated by english standards, but actually quite inhabited by west coast Norwegian standards!

We pulled up at the only beach car park, albeit you could park on the road and also along the harbour if you needed to. The car park had direct access to the surf, a couple of people were camping in it, there was a toilet block with some showers and some brick made bbq areas where you could light the obligatory fire (moreover to warm you up when you got of the water, we were there in summer and there was a still bite in the wind and the sea was pretty chilly!)

We spent a good few hours there and when we came to leave, Kath pointed me to a little timber kiosk, no bigger then the sort of things people in the uk sell flowers and eggs by the side of the road. In it was a pad, a pen, an enclosed post box and a sign - we had no idea what it was or what it said. At the time we thought no more of it and carried on our merry way none the wiser.

Peddle forward a couple of years to last October and we were scouting out the mountains up around Hessdalen where we had been told about this amazing toll road leading up to the mountain lake and that we had to take it.

At the entrance to the toll road was another of these said kiosks, except this time with the luxury of 2 years of being slightly more fluent (ahem .....its all relative...) in Norwegian and by association, i.e its a toll road, ergo you probably need to pay, we figured it out.

So the poster has prices on for the use of the toll road / car park - it's a single rate for the day (which is really cheap or you can buy a week, month or annual pass) BUT here's the best thing........ you write your registration number on a piece of paper and pop that and your payment into an envelope and post it into the letter box! There's no CCTV, no man in the booth, no checking, it's all based on trust. On the toll road at Hessdalen there also composting toilets (i.e maintenance free), little shelters to have fires in which often people leave candles, sticks, matches and in one even some kids toys! (I guess the local school use it?)

Can you imagine that happening in the UK!!!.....I must one day also tell the story of the honesty bar at Fagerness airport! - yep that's right folks at an airport there is tea, coffee, snacks and other drinks and when you take one you just put your money in tin... Exeter airport take note!

So this is a public apology to owner of the Hoddevik car park, but when i return I will put in double to make up for my oversight. 

So how does this relate to our community situation, well maybe we should try the trust box out - see how it works at Saunton or other beach car parks...........what do you think?

Also, as an aside, at one toll booth leading up to Killingdal there was a magpie lying at the base of the booth.... I later found out that in Norway you get paid for shooting magpies as they are considered vermin, so maybe the last person forget his wallet, but luckily for him remembered his rifle............

Tåke!

This word means fog in Norwegian.  I don't like fog. 

We learnt all about fog last week, and the impact fog can have on flights.  We weren't the only ones, most of the flights to the South East of England (and Amsterdam) were delayed by the fog.

We arrived a the airport, went straight through to the departure area to wait, and noticed that the flight to Amsterdam was delayed. The kids played, and we caught up with social media & emails as one does these days. Ah, the bliss we felt, not knowing how much the fog was going to distrupt our best laid plans.

Our flight was called, and we all trooped off through passport control and into the departure gate to wait for boarding. We waited a bit more, and a little while longer before being told that there was a 3 hour delay due to fog at Gatwick. Had that happened in the UK, I think the reaction of the passengers would have been different. We politely listened to the rest of the announcement, and Norwegian Air offered us all meal vouchers - could you imagine one of the other budget airlines voluntarily offering meal vouchers? (Turned out to be about £35 worth of meal vouchers too!)

Now, the flight normally leaves at 6pm and arrives at 7.30pm and there are usually lots of children on the flight home.  This time was no exception, so after some food, Jim put a DVD on the laptop and got all the kids to watch.  Other parents shared snacks and the atmosphere was actually quite relaxed - the kids were happy and occupied.

Eventually the flight was called and we departed at 10pm.  To be honest the flight was actually really smooth, apart from the landing where we literally came out of the fog and landed with a bit of a bump. With no hold bags, we were through passport control and customs and back at the van by midnight with minimal pushing and shoving to get on the bus to the car park; I have sharp little elbows!

Now, I was due back at work at 9am Monday morning, but Jim had the day off work, so the deal was he would sleep on the flight; I would sleep on the drive home. Thanks to the fog, I was required to stay awake (eventfully permitted to have 3 x 20 minute naps, 1 on the m4, 1 on the m5 and the last one on the link road back to foggy North Devon. Although the last nap might have been a little bit longer than the regulation 20 minutes......)  The kids were brilliant and slept all the way home, woke briefly to be put into bed and slept until 7.30.  Jim and I finally fell into bed at 4.30 before getting up at 7. 

And you know what? We all made it to school, nursery and work on time, dressed and with everything we should have had. 

Relaxed

I'm not going to say it too loud, but I think we're relaxed.

It all started when we had dinner at Gatwick. We went somewhere different where the atmosphere was less frantic that the pub we normally go to. We had a window seat so the kids could use their free binoculars to look at the planes (although not terribly useful in the dark).  There was enough time for duty free shopping and for the kids to have a lovely time in the play zone. Oh and Jim managed a nap too!

There was a slight hiccup on the flight as we hit some nasty turbulence, but the kids don't know that it might be something to be scared of, so giggled like maniac and said it was like going through jelly.  

We had some chores to do before getting here, and even though the roof isn't finished, the kids rooms aren't quite finished, we don't have a porch and steps to get into the house (strange contraption made of panels and scaffolding bits) and Jim fell down the trench in the basement having told the kids to be careful, it is very lovely to be here. 

Mountain folk...

Bolig Drøm

With our next trip to the house getting ever closer (and it being half term), excitement is building. We also have a meeting planned with the plumber and Magnus, our builder.

It is with this meeting in mind that I am spending my Saturday afternoon listening to radio 2, and looking through the many Norwegian interior/homes magazines trying to gain inspiration for the bathrooms! #happydays

Taken

The builders started work a few weeks ago on the foundations; Jim received some photos so we could see what had been done - I shan't bore you with them they were photos of beams next to other beams (I suspect that I will be told the technical term soon!).  Not being an architect or builder I didn't really know what to make of the photos, all I know is that the foundations are better now, and frankly that's all that matters to me.

However they've now moved onto replacing the roof. 

They've sent some more photos - looks like there's been nice weather in Ålen just recently - but nerves have started to kick in.  And then today, a friend emailed through some more and it hasn't alleviated the anxiousness.

So this was how the house looked until last week (with less snow ;) )

And this is it now (complete with waste water treatment thingy!)

But the porch has gone! 

Initially (well when I woke up at 3 this morning stressing about things), I thought it would be fine to stay there in just under 2 weeks with the kids.  We can use a ladder I thought. Then reality kicks in; each time one of the kids needs a wee (and you know,it won't be at the same time, but 5 minutes later!) we'll have to help them up and down; can we manage to lift our heavy bags in and out; will we need 2 ladders in order to reach the key safe?  My last thought, and the nail in this particular coffin was - I'm not f--king carry a full camping toilet down a ladder!

So to plan B. ...make the call.....*

Mind you, for some; the excitement has proved too much 😉 

* Obviously not plan B. Only Jim's warped sense of humour having watched Taken quite a bit recently (in our defence it's been on Film 4 just lately. A lot).

Saucisson

In an unusual twist of experimentation this is a joint blog post...... :O

.....So on this rather cold September evening with the sun setting earlier, I thought it was time to reminisce over this summers Nordic expedition.

A 2 week stay always goes quick, especially when meeting builders (now a normal holiday treat), tripping to ikea (no more please) and on this occasion entertaining our first guests :) 

When we first started to mention our idea to buy a house in Norway and one day move there, some of our friends were really supportive; some were indifferent; some thought we were (are) mad and some tried to get us to move to Bristol instead!

We've known T & E for nearly 13 years, in fact I met T shortly after Jim and I got married - we worked for the same organisation doing the same job; me in Exeter her in Bristol.  And now Jim is god father to their eldest daughter, M, and the kids call each other their God families.

We've tried to persuade them to visit Norway before we bought the house, but the timing didn't work.  Until this year, when they said yep, they'd love to come out and visit during our 2 week trip.

So whilst Grampa was wallpapering the dining room, the kids and I were making our friends room as tidy and as pretty as we could; stringing up fairy lights, making beds, hoovering the walls (cos they're made of wood) and collecting wild flowers.

I had one moment of complete 'Oh my god they're going to miss the flight!' when I texted T to find out where they were.  She replied 'Still on the M25, check in at 6pm', only it was already 5.40pm! Confusion reigned for a while and I couldn't understand why Jim was looking so relaxed.  'But it's almost 6!', I wailed, 'they'll miss the flight!'  

Eventually I realised the flaw in my thinking, it might well be nearly 6 in Norway, but it was only nearly 5 in the UK, and of course they'd have enough time to check in etc.  (They didn't have a huge amount of time once they'd made it through check in and security, but that's a tale for another time!)

So Saturday dawned slightly cloudy, and Jim and I decided to brave the solar shower (in honour of our friends coming later) - with extra hot water in mine, but it was still on the rather cold side! He managed to perfect the art of showering naked in the front garden whilst not being seen across the valley (he wishes....) or by the postman (luckily they only deliver to your box mounted on a post nearby and not on your house in Norway)

(Ha bet you thought it was going to be a photo of Jim showering! No, just the kids watching him shower!)

Our guests are lovely old friends of ours (aka Broadsword or Danny Boy not sure which) and whilst we wanted to pull out all the stops to show them what our little piece of Scandinavia has to offer (they are Nordic Virgins or norgins / virdics as we like to say.....which is course complete bollocks as I've never used that expression in life before and it's highly unlikely ever to catch on....) we were also very aware of the lack in facilities....however....as far as I'm aware no one fell into the composting loo or touched the seemingly endless abundance of wolfsbane growing everywhere (thank you Edd for the identification).  ...although the kids did manage a tandem toilet stop, turns out the 2 adjacent seats are fun when you're little.....yet to be tried in adult life (unless i just wasn't invited...?)

We managed to explore the mountains, discover waterfalls, explore an old mine (don't worry it was a guided tour - Olavsgruva, highly recommended), visit Røros and the church (which by the way in case I haven't said before was the inspiration for Disney's Frozen church in Arendal!). We even managed to insult the French, which is something one should never pass up on holiday (ok...so it wasn't a full on insult, but more of a jokey little fun when in the mine and we sent the French in the wrong direction.....oh come on you know you would to.....btw they were fine and made it out safely...at least I'm pretty sure that was them I saw leaving....)

One of the great delights of having friends on holiday (and grandpa as well) is that as well as the hard work demolishing the huge area of rose bay willow herb which was occupying the majority of the garden area (by hand sytheing I would hasten to add, albeit it was less Poldark more Trumpton...) it was the fact the we were able to have some great get togethers and share what to date has been quite a eccentric dream of ours which others have often thought we were crazy about. 

One such evening was a great BBQ (in norwegian called a grilling) at which I finally got to use my newly purchased Espegård Bålpanne (posh hanging fire pit) which I had been coveting since our original norwegian trips........this is jim now in case you hadn't realised.....

I made some new benches from old barn structural timber which had been lying about (let's hope I don't need that at some point) and then we (aka the chuckle brothers) set about erecting a temporary canopy in case of rain (which of course never came as the sun shone, like it did most of the time!).

The canopy, benches and fire pit were almost worthy of a feature spread in country living (well 'country hanging out' maybe, if they don't do that periodical then they should...I might publish that myself .....one thing at a time). There was the the 9 of us plus our great friends Morten and Lill from the village, who we were finally able to say thank you to in style. There were also 2 of their granddaughters who had travelled from Trondheim on the bus on their own (2 hour trip....they are 9 and 7....imagine doing that in England!!!!) they were very excited about meeting Maisie again and she even had a play date down at their place earlier in the day. We also had a late night visit from Arvid and his wife (the original owner of the house) who popped over to say hei! And make sure we were ok!

We drank the very lovely bottle of champagne Grampa bought Jim for his 40th that I carted all the way to Norway in the ugly suitcase (have we mentioned the ugly suitcase before?!) during mine and Neds epic journey last October!

So it turns out the language of children's games is universal and knows no boundaries with them playing musical cups, loom bands, bracelets, stickers, endless cartwheels (oh dear god the endless cartwheels.....) and colouring and we even got to the bottom of norwegian cluedo which they had just discovered!

It is with some sadness though that I must report that the language of adults is not so universal. Whilst I always thought I was doing quite well with my Norwegian, it turns out that on occasion (many recent occasions it seems) that the reason my request for a bag at the supermarket was always greeted with amusement was in fact because I had been asking for a sausage and not a bag.....easily done. pølsen = sausage ......Posen = bag. If in doubt ask a 9 year old to explain.......oops. 

Wallpapering

So Grampa came with us this trip, and he was given the job of wallpapering a wall in the dining room.

The dining room faces south and east; beautiful views, but the room is really quite drab and uninspiring.  Jim and I spent almost 3 months deciding on wallpaper for it - loads of samples (which the kids thought were great for drawing on), we eventually found the desired print in Laura Ashley - not somewhere we usually go. 

So the day before our friends arrived Grampa set to work.  12 hours after starting, at 11pm he finally finished (and yes he did have breaks, we did feed and water him and I even did the washing up instead of him!)

We're quite chuffed with the result!

Gamle Bybro, the Bryggen and an unexpected journey.

I was explaining to a friend today about how Jim and I miss things when we go to cities. In Bergen we couldn't find the old Wharf; in Oslo we missed quite a lot, and we even managed to lose the Eiffel Tower in Paris once, so it shouldn't be a surprise that on our first trip to Trondheim we couldn't find Gamle Bybro and Bryggen (the Old Bridge & the Wharf).

As Grampa was with us we decided to take him into Trondheim and show him around (and not just IKEA!). 

After a couple of wrong turns, we found the Old Bridge, and then beautiful old timber buildings along the wharf. 

We were really lucky as the weather was beautiful (it had been very rainy in Norway for weeks before we arrived) and the kids were able to run around and make lots of noise - if you know our kids, then you know this is a Good Thing!

We then looped back around and went to see Nidaros Cathedral - the mostly northerly gothic cathedral. The kids then found the old cannons, so whilst Jim retraced him steps to find his phone, they were happily blowing things up, shouting Kaboom!

Now something you may not know about Trondheim is that it's the technological centre of Norway, and the city provides free Wifi, which is great when waiting outside yet another outdoor shop for Jim!

IKEA came next, and with full tummies and car boot, empty bladders and wallets we headed home, only to face another Stengt sign, but this one came with a diversion sign and a Man! A slight map hiccup, a detour around a housing estate (very nice too), back to the man to ask for directions, we found the diversion route which, instead of following the river valley, took us up and up and up over the mountains, past farms, beautiful pasture lands and waterfalls before finally winding its way back to the river valley.

The next time we headed to Trondheim, Grampa stayed home - I think the last loop in IKEA almost finished him off!

Arrivals

We arrived here on Monday, well technically Tuesday, following what was fairly a straight forward journey (if you include the HUGE amount of tourists on the road.....oh wait that's us too and the obligatory search at security) until 10 minutes before the gate number at Gatwick was called. The flight was delayed. Not by much - 20 minutes, but when you consider that the flight would now arrive at 11.50pm and we'd arranged to collect a hire car, it was enough to cause mild concern.

The kids, I think, were quite happy as they finally managed to play the big connect 4 set in the children's area, but Jim and I were getting more tense with each passing moment (well me really. Jim was going to sleep on the plane & I had to stay awake & look after Maisie and Ned, and also had been told to STAY AWAKE on the drive!).

The flight was called, and we boarded and we left about an hour later than scheduled, but the pilot put his foot down, or whatever pilots do, and we arrived half an hour later than planned. Although given the car hire situation it didn't really help matters, so Jim scooted through immigration on his own to get the car rather than waiting for the bags with us.

So 20 minutes later, 4 hold bags gathered, 2 pajama clad children, 3 adults, 7 carry on bags and one plastic carrier bag we were crammed into the hire car and off we set.  Only to fail at the first hurdle! The main road to Trondheim, the E6, was closed. Properly. Barriers across the road, big flashing red lights closed. Stengt.

After a brief few minutes heading along the road in the wrong direction, we turned around and following a short discussion (ahem), we went back to the garage at the airport and obtained directions.  We set off again in the wrong direction, but ended up in the right direction (if you see what I mean). Turns out one of the main tunnels was closed, so we had to go over the top!

The rest of our journey was uneventful, and we finally arrived home at 2.30 Tuesday morning. Shattered, but happy.

The one question remained, why don't Norwegians use diversion signs?

Packing

As we don't have mains water in Norway, or indeed a washing machine, we have to bring all the bedding and towels home with us, so since April it has been washed and vacuum packed and sat in our bedroom in an IKEA bag, to which we had added random items that are coming with us.

Jim then started packing the non clothing items about 3 weeks ago and then got out the other bags to take.  So our bedroom has been sort of like an obstacle course!

Today we have finally finished packing, well apart from toiletries and food for the journey.

We bought a bag weighing device which is invaluable, so each bag has been packed and weighed. Then re packed and weighed. Then re packed. Then weighed again, and in some cases re packed and weighed. Again.

There are 3 adults and 2 children travelling.

We have 4 hold bags (each weighing just under 20kg), and 2 suitcases, 1 hold-all, 3 rucksacks as carry on, plus another one when Jim's dad arrives tomorrow! Not to mention the inevitable Boots carrier bag from the airport!

Oh my god!

And the thing is, it's all essential. 

On the plus side when we come home we'll only have 2 hold bags......

Patience dear boy....

BWith just over a week to go till we fly out and the Hoover already packed (you need to keep up....) the kids are currently residing at grandmas and we're sat drinking tea and hot chocolate in bed......living the dream baby ...:/.  It's been a very odd few weeks and too be honest not the easiest of weeks, but focussing on how I might be able to route drainage through the house keeps me positive....(yeah I know) ...   We were at a great wedding last night tucked into the secret beach at tunnels in ilfracombe and set against a backdrop of the sea. A group of us managed to congregate around the fire pit for some warmth ( after much piss taking over the man trying to light it and his rather bad attempts.....never light a fire in front of a panel of experts ) and it was lovely to have so many positive comments and discussions with people who don't think we're mad....     One person asked me ( I promise I was  asked) to show them some pictures and I duly whipped out my phone to show them and flicked quickly past one which id forgotten about taken across the border in Sweden ( about 39 minutes away) but that captures the feeling at some points  in time.  Read into it what you will.....but for me it shows many things, not least of all that sometimes you just need to be patient.................…..................

.........and in Scandinavia  always wear warm pants and a vest as it can get cold waiting for your dinner to swim by.

Vikings

When we tell people that we bought a house in Norway, one of the first questions is 'Oh are you Norwegian?' 

Well as far as we know, both of us are pure Anglo Saxon.  However my sister posted this photo of our parents wedding @1973, and given the appearance of one of uncle's (very blonde far right), I'm now wondering if there is some Viking blood somewhere!

Crockery....

After a very busy month, we sat down at the weekend to finally watch Kevin mcClouds 'Escape to the wilderness' and watched a  couple from Wales’ adventure in northern Sweden unfold on the TV. They had followed their dreams of living off grid with their Huskies and lived a pretty sparse, but i have to say beautiful, existence with their dogs, collecting water from the river, rolling in the snow (you know you want to) and chopping wood to keep their 2 stoves going 24/6. There were 2 things that really stood out for in me in the programme - the first, that when he started talking about food he almost went into some kind of trance, especially when on the subject of battered sausages and indian takeaways, and the second thing was that he had used expanding foam to fill around his windows! 

Now you might be thinking how did I notice the expanding foam, but it was actually the first thing I spotted after thinking “what a great looking cabin and that external woodturning flue looks a bit dodgy”. You might think - expanding foam, so what? But whilst i don’t want this to be a rant about the bizarre virtues of expanding foam I’ve seen used in cars, by builders who couldn’t work out how to fill a gap and on some lovely old buildings in the past (now there’s a Dragons Den product - "conservation" expanding foam) it just made me chuckle that expanding foam had even reached the wilds of northern Sweden….i’m guessing it’s probably better than stuffing lichen and moss in the gaps (or is it?) …..

Now surprisingly (despite the expanding foam faux pas), I thought …."these guys are amazing - what an adventure", even to the point of making their own clothes from reindeer skins, or only having a fridge under the house and having to hike for 30 minutes for a shower, or to Skype his children from his car abandoned in a car park ( i assume within range of a free wifi….done that before, but don’t tell anyone ;)…). I particularly liked his external ablution block consisting of shower and sauna that he made, and that he went starkers whilst Kevin retained his modesty with a pair of boardshorts whilst they went for a snow dunk outside (although i like a good sauna I’m yet to be brave enough to throw myself into the snow afterwards (butt naked or otherwise)).

We are back at "Litj Stuggu Vollen” (the name i’m told our house used to be called many years ago and I think means "small house on the hill/valley" but probably means "knackered house falling down the hillside”) in 4 weeks time. The usual bizzare pre trip lists and purchases (see previous posts ref the Dyson and the Khazi ;) )are well underway, as are preparations with the builders with the work we have already(at least i think we have) booked in for this year and what we might be able to achieve next year (funds allowing). The packing this year time has taken a slight twist in events and I quite fancy taking a musical instrument to make the most of the beautiful summer (apparently there has been 3 days of summer so far…. ;/)  evenings and evening daylight. During the summer solstice, sunrise was at about 3.05 am and sunset at 23.50 according to my weather app, but i suspect in reality it probably felt like it never set. For the trip in a few weeks I’m therefore anticipating very light nights and  as such been trying to source some cheap blackout material to take so at least the kids might sleep a little and not wake me up at 3.30!  

We will of course get proper blinds at some point, but stick on blackout seems the way forward at present. Anyhow……the cheapest place i could find blackout material wasn’t from a child friendly mums type internet shop, but actually from a marijuana growing emporium i found on line in birmingham! I believe its all legal but i did have to chuckle when then advert said that all deliveries come in discreet packaging! Suffice to say it tuned up this week, all 8 linear metres of it (enough to do our and the guest bedroom) and as far i can tell its doesn’t smell like its been stocked next to a collection of seedlings…..i guess the sniffer dog at Gatwick might tell me otherwise though. (apparently they have internet access in prison so hopefully i’ll be fine…..)

Right, back to light evenings and things to take……well if you read one of my earlier posts then i thought i might see if i can squirrel my banjo away for the trip (see Shalkletons banjo story), in this way i can actually practice without annoying anyone (apart from everyone in the valley when the sound resinates) but more importantly i can sit on my porch doing my bad version of duelling banjos. Its also gives me an great excuse to use this photo i found on a Norwegian photo archive website (verdalsbilder.no)  entitled “med pipe, trekkspil go banjo” depicting 2 young woman (girls) playing a banjo ukulele, accordion, but also bizarrely smoking a pipe ………..now i’m sure I saw a pipe on that blackout material website….

Oh yes and crockery……..well like i said, its been a very busy month and we often talk about life being like spinning plates, trying to keep them all going at once, well sometimes they fall off, but the trick is when the do break to shout ‘opa’ in a greek stylee, pick up another one, get it spinning and carry on……... or alternatively not pay your taxes and then leave the EU….(in a greek stylee).

Horsepower....

I have this romantic notion that one day we will be self sufficient, but of course in reality it's highly unlikely we'll ever pull it off. I've collected and read (ok so for some I've just looked at the pictures) a great collection of books ranging from living off grid by Nick Rosen to an absolute 'good life' classic called the 'the complete book of self sufficiency' by John Seymour which includes everything from how to plan out your land and clear the tree stumps, through to how to butcher a pig! It also has a great matrix (not that I'm sure matrices were around in the 70's) comparing the pros and cons of tractor ownership against a horse or indeed an Ox! 

Now, who wouldn't want to own a tractor ?........ But.......reading between the lines I think owning a horse could be the way forward....

They don't require diesal, don't need taxing and more importantly their waste can be used to help grow more crops. 

Of course the downside is I'm actually not that fond of horses and have almost got less of a clue how to look after a horse then fix a steering box on a tractor (which I have no idea on either in case you were wandering .....), however, we are already partly kitted out for horse ownership though and when I find Norways version of Mole Valley Farmers,  imagine the fun I can have finally buying a horse coat! ......for those who aren't devon folk, mole valley farmers is the most fantastic country outlet, selling products that allow you to delouse your chickens or inseminate your cows (I'll draw a sketch next time) through to a pair of tweeds or a tractor linkage. .......Fabulous place.  

As I mentioned in an earlier post, when we bought the house we acquired a huge amount of stuff, which included old farm equipment. So aside from finding a 4 legged companion to actually do the work and figuring out how the all the tack actually fits,  we're good to go. We even have 2 stables in the barn. The entrance and floor into the big barn is worn away through years of horses coming and going and the stable divides have the signs of having been used to satisfy a good set of knawing knashers. It's these old objects, features and patina in the fabric that make the story and heritage of the place.

 I had originally thought when we'd bought the house that the seller was the grandson of the original owner/builder, but it has since emerged he was actually more of a distant relative.  We still however have a great selection of photos of the original owner and his descendants, including one of who we think is his son, stood outside the house with his horse! 

Of particular note are 2 things.....firstly that the wall he's stood in front off is still the original stone foundation wall, now replaced with blocks ( and needing repair) and secondly (and for most people) more interesting, I think we still have the hat in the house!

So watch this space ......at some point you might see a similar photo in years to come, I might however be sat on a quad bike...... ;)  

Backdraft..........

So as you might have gathered we are back from our easter (påske) expedition to norway via lots of trips to ikea ( well 3 in total, with 1 self inflicted due to buying the wrong fridge and freezer!) but it's been an amazing trip. 

We had the now routine meeting with the builder who very kindly gave up a morning of his holiday to see us ( thank you Magnus and Ivan). I managed to build a bench for the dining table from old bits of wood I found including old barn timbers, reassemble the beautiful tall woodburner, survey the barn (låve) and more importantly install a kitchen! ...as well as go skiing, dog sledding, attend a few easter parties (more on those another time ;) )

Now you might be thinking when did we get water installed, but you'd be wrong.....we still have no water! Well we do but it's about 100 m up the side of the mountain in the well, buried under snow......

So it was our first time all sleeping in the house as a family ( which was great and made better by the purchase of a new sofa bed from ikea......for the record one of neighbours pointed out that other furniture shops are available in scandanavia .lol ) 

2 weeks without mains water or drainage has its challenges. We of course bought water for drinking, but it's not cheap, so  you don't want to be doing the washing up in it (or washing the kids in it) so we had to get water from other sources.  

We started for the first couple of days constantly melting snow in an old pot on the woodburner, but you have to melt a lot of snow for not much water. What we found much more successful was collecting already melted snow (ie water ) from the roof during the day when the overnight snow melted for a few hours. We easily collected about 25 -50 litres a day with this method, which would have taken a huge amount of snow melting.

It's amazing when you have to collect your own water how careful you are using it! But also it gives you a real indication of much water you actually waste during the day in our normal tap turning on luxury! 

Once we nailed the water collection ( took about 3 days) then we finally bathed the kids in a washing up bowl in front of the fire (lots of fun) and managed to indulge in our strip washes (which I haven't done since I was about 5 and used to stay at my great grandparents house with my folks at the weekends!)

At the end of the first week most of the kitchen was in, including installing the sink with a tap ( looked nice anyway) and waste that went into a bucket! It sounds mad, but a sink at a decent height is so much easier for washing dishes and yourself in! 

You might recall that on our first trip last October I flew over with a toilet in my hold baggage ( well camping kharzi, ie a bucket with seat) and this proved to be a great indoor companion which was emptied into our composting loo in the barn on regular occasion.  I personally ( is this too much information.....) quite enjoyed using the outhouse ( even at -11...it focuses the mind) but after 2 weeks it was getting a little whiffy. The science of a good composting loo is worthy of a blog post on its own, but one of the things you do need is a good sawdust flush! So I found a good source of sawdust which was is now neatly bucketed with a spade for ease of use. 

I did however find you need to be careful of one particular aspect though....backdraft.....different to the American 90s classic firefighting film but with similar devastating, albeit non life threatening  effects...... So when you utilise the sawdust flush make sure you don't lean over the pan if it's windy outside, otherwise you get an upwind of saw dust in your face......never good.....

By the way, I should mention our toilet is a 2 person affair ( if you feel that way inclined) amazingly one of our friends said he remembers his grandmas outhouse  which was a seven seater! Now that's being sociable :).  

What a difference a day makes

For the last 2 weeks we've both been reading the weather forecast with mounting excitement and/or worry about the state of the road to our house.

It didn't really come as much of a surprise that there wasn't any snow in Trondheim, but it did when we got here to see very little snow.

Still the kids got to play in what little we had.

But then later in the day it snowed, and it snowed a bit more, then we had a massive dumping of snow, then we went to bed.

And we woke up to this:

And as I'm sat in my comfy kitchen chair this evening, it is snowing again.

No, I didn't get lost

Those of you who know me, know that I rarely go wrong with my sense of direction - my dad always said I had an inbuilt compass, but when I do go wrong it tends to be Very Well Done.

Please if any of you are planning to come to and visit (and we hope that you are!), take note. I will say this only once.

When driving around Trondheim, always stay in the outside lane.

In my defence I was very tired and was following Jim without really paying attention to my surroundings (shan't be doing that again!) so it came as a bit of a shock when suddenly he indicated he was moving into the outside lane without much warning. Now I couldn't. There was a ruddy Great Big Lorry on my outside, leaving no where to go, but down the slip road and off to who knows where......(actually I did know as we'd taken that junction earlier when collecting the hire van and eventually you get to Trondheim city centre and drive past Nidaros Cathedral).

I had a few minutes to think about what to do, but coupled with Ned asking where daddy and Mimi were, and me trying to find a sign for Oslo (southbound) it was a bit tricky. 

Thankfully my sensible self kicked into gear (although occasionally my idiot self could be heard shouting shit, fuck inside my head), and we got back on the E6. Going North though, as there was no other south bound slip road. 2 junctions back up the motorway, turned round, a bit of ferreting around in my bag to find my phone in case Jim had called and we were back on track In The Outside Lane, you know just in case.

Norway might have strict laws about parking on street corners (ask Jim) and speeding, but they don't mind you texting or phoning whilst driving which was useful.

Quick phone call from Jim to ascertain that we were okay and where to meet him, and we were off again. 

Finally making it home for tea time.

So you see I was right, I didn't get lost, and my dad was right - keep turning left and you'll always find your way back.

It's nearly time

For snowboots!

And potential embarrassment at airport security. These beauties are lovely, but it has been known for it to take me up to 5 minutes to take them off.

Luckily Ned doesn't have the same issues!

Baggage allowance.

We're slowly accumulating things in the house, books, games, a few clothes and a light fitting we used to have in our last house ready to pack.

Jim got the bags out of the attic a few days ago and so we've packed 2 ski bags and 2 hold bags. 

We then realised that we might just need an extra hold bag, or Ned and I would be wearing some very .......... eclectic outfits!

So an extra hold bag has been duly added, and I can only say thank god we are also hiring a van, as I really don't know how we would get everything in the small car 😬

Jim and I will do the packing in a couple of days; the kids however are all packed.

Apparently. 

Although Ned did have to go and fetch snuggle, Magnus and Bear out before bed.

It's tricky......

The year we got married we also went on a 3 week holiday to America (it had been postponed, so not entirely down to poor planning!), and moved house, where the dining room ceiling promptly collapsed, and the cooker didn't work. By the time we got married we were both drugged up to the eyeballs on paracetamol having come down with severe colds. Someone said that we don't make life easy for ourselves. Little did they know (muttered darkly).

If you read Jim's last post, you'll know the fun we've got with delivery vans, low bridges and ikea delivery days.

We bought our kitchen, we'll sort of, it's been sitting in our virtual shopping basket for a few days until we got the right delivery date, after all it worked okay here, so what could possibly go wrong?

Ha!  Easter! That's what went wrong. Norway celebrate Easter on Thursday, and Friday, Sunday and Monday. Ikea don't do deliveries on Maundy Thursday. The only bloody Thursday we're there for!  It's okay, we thought, we can sort this out.

First issue - we have a smallish hire car, and we won't be able to fit everything and everybody in it! 

So. 

We all drive to Trondheim and buy what we need, Jim will drop me and a nominated child of his choice (ie Ned) at the station and see us at home. Right, there are only 2 trains a day (and I thought North devon was bad!), the last one being at 1.10pm. Will we be done in time?

So instead we'll stop at said store on our way past, make a note of what we want, and Jim will drive back another day to purchase everything and drive home. 

Doesn't really make for a fun day for anyone.

Jim then had a lightbulb moment. Hire A Van!

Now during all of this we've been reading the Ikea website, and we eventually came to realise that we can't actually buy the very lovely grey kitchen units I want in store. They gave to be ordered online & delivered to their warehouse or Henteterminal, by the fjord in Trondheim. So we go through the motions and get our delivery date - we could book the right date for our plan! Drive to the house, get it warm and settled. 2 days later return to Trondheim (@ 2 hr drive away), collect the van, collect our things from the henteterminal, all drive home (car and van as Jim will need help to unload), unload. Drive back to Trondheim, return van, then drive home. Again. As the Norwegians celebrateEaster on Maundy Thursday we can't return the van then, hence the ridiculous to-ing and fro-ing.

Except the kids will spend All Day in a vehicle.

So we had a cup of tea to think about it.

Then came my lightbulb moment (and its Genius!). 

Collect hire car at airport when we arrive, drive to other hire car depot to collect van, drive to the warehouse collect our stuff, drive home. Unload. Drive back the next day, return the van, visit Trondheim, and drive home.

Except the delivery date to have the kitchen delivered to this wretched warehouse has now changed. It will now be delivered After Easter. This is Not Good.

By this point I am now fed up of kitchens, ikea, delivery dates and vans and driving. (And reader, I expect you are too!).

So our final plan submitted is:

Drive to Gatwick. Fly to Trondheim. Stay overnight in the airport hotel. One parent and one child per room (guess who I've got!). Yummy hotel breakfast (as an aside when you come to visit, stay at the Radisson Blu hotel at the airport, they do very good breakfasts). Collect hire car from Sixt. Drive to other Sixt depot to collect hire van. Drive to ikea. Buy lights, curtains, oven, hob, kitchen units (not the Very Lovely Grey units I want, but ones that are in stock in store hopefully!) and a sofa bed (wait, what? When did we decide on a sofa bed?). Drive home, unload. Next day drive back in convoy to return the hire van, visit Trondheim (there is more than a certain Swedish home store there honest). Drive home. Collapse.

Which is what we'll do.

That's a big ten four rubber ducky.

Broadsword calling Danny boy....

So we're in the process of prepping up for a 10 day visit over the easter holiday period which is only two and half weeks away and I currently having feelings of yay and eek. (Yay and eek should be characters from a mid nineties morning breakfast show....). So on the yay side, the ski slopes will be open, there should be plenty of snow on the ground to still frolick in and it will also be the first time we've stayed at the house. On the eek side, it's the first time we've stayed at the house and it's the first time we've stayed at the house!  

Now your probably thinking....and? so what? (Good point in fairness but as ive committed to blog writing I have to keep it going plus it gets better, I promise (in my opinion)). 

Well on the last work weekend of light and heating fitting I, at least made the house habitable to some extent, albeit the sanitary arrangements are some what below par to say the least, with a composting loo in the barn and running water courtesy of Imsdal (Norway's equivalent of Volvic but with cooler bottles). Which reminds me to talk about pants.....

So before I get back to the point in hand,  one of Norways great little traits is its penchant for Pant. Pant I hear you ask? That's right Pant...the fact that you when you buy a drink in a plastic bottle you pay a surcharge (pant) and then when you take it back to the recycling machine you get your Pant back in the form of a printed receipt which is effectively a money off voucher from your next shop - genius! And of course the best thing if you're a kid is that if your parents save up your bottles and do them a in one go then there's usually enough pant for sweetie buying - kind of like a pants for sweets deal - oops did I really just write that because that sounds so very dodgy!  Anyhow the point I was trying to make is that in Norway they actively (by charging) encourage good recycling practice and make the bottles more durable, but over here we stuff them in a green plastic tubs in our kitchen cupboards and then leave them in the alley where a large lorry drives up and collects them etc etc. ( good us of taxpayer money ...Hmmm) anyhow enough of pants.  Where the hell was I ...

So back to habitable houses....one of things I'm trying to sort out is the basic cooking arrangements. Other than camping stove we have and log burners. So I've been looking into getting a cooker or even pushing the boat out and starting to plan out the kitchen. So I found an online appliance company, found a cooker and vent hood and then embarked on looking at deliveries and placing orders and here is where my problems started. The actual delivery dates were fairly well set ( Thursday's in our neck of the woods) but I suddenly remembered what about bridge?  If you've ever watched grand designs and thought 'stupid fools' why didn't they think of that then be prepared for de Ja vu.....because whilst having the railway line and station to the village is great and provides us with access to the main line between Oslo and Trondheim it comes at a price, and in our case the price is the low bridge that splits our road from the the main road....oh and yes means lorry access is restricted -doh (if déjà vu is hitting then quite right).  We did realise it was there but hadn't fully comprehended the full extent of the problem until the cooker company said they could meet us in the village and we could then drive the stuff up to the house! Now in the case of a cooker that that might be fine but  thinking if we ever need a cement mixer then I'm not sure the hires cars boot is the best form of secondary transport....... looks like I might need to buy a tractor after all....

On a further eek point kath and I are sooooo excited to be welcoming our first guests in the summer for a short week of glamping at the house (just without the the glam bit ...we have warned them...so it's just ping) and whilst when I started to write this I had thought Broadsword calling Danny boy was from a Bridge Too Far (which if you've managed to stay with me so far would have made sense ) it is of course from 'Where Eagles dare' (or where Eagles date as my autocorrect churned out which is surely going to make a great film as well) and is the great call signs Richard Burton uses when he needs help from his colleagues back home..........so Edd if your reading this  -you guys enjoy your stay with us in the summer ;)